- me to all my friends: YOU CAN DO IT. YOU MAKE YOUR OWN LIFE. LET'S DO THIS TOGETHER. COME ON!!!
- me to myself: you fucking piece of shit you will amount to nothing nothing is worth it your feelings are irrational go sleep for 22 hours
2) If you critiqued a fan favourite and did not enjoy the game, commenters will try to persuade you to kill yourself.
3) If you critiqued a game and you previously critiqued a fan favourite unfavourably the fans of the previous game will appear to tell you your critique is meaningless and will try to persuade you to kill yourself.
4) If you critiqued something that is not a fan favourite and really enjoyed the game, commenters will accuse you of being paid off for your opinion and will try to persuade you to kill yourself.
5) If you are a woman and you have written about topics in the game pertaining particularly to matters concerning your gender’s outlook or socialisation commenters will try to persuade you to kill yourself.
6) If you wrote a piece of New Games Journalism, describing your playthrough as more of a travelogue or personal journey as analysis of the game, commenters will type ‘BUT IS IT ANY GOOD THOUGH’ or ‘BUT WHAT ABOUT THE ACTUAL GAME’ and then try to persuade you to kill yourself.
Happily, commenters are usually not very good writers, and so largely are very unpersuasive in getting you to kill yourself."